Heart(s) of a Champion

Just got back from Denver.

Had two friends wuss out on seeing me. They have no heart.

However, in the game of Hearts, my first time playing, I found myself with 88 points. If I was forced to take the queen of spades, I'd be a goner.

However, I played it cool. I started accumulating hearts, telling everyone how I wanted to go home. With four cards in my hand, I started the play by laying a card down on the table. I had three left in my hand.

Ms. Fiancee laid a card less than mine, in suit (not a spade).

Then Mr. Fiancee looked at Ms. Fiancee, and said, "Hon, have you collected any hearts in this round?"

She stopped thinking about her can in a wedding dress for one second and answered, "Yes, sweetums."

Then that fat codger laid down the Unlucky Lady.

Then the fourth person laid down a card less than mine, in suit.

The taunting began but no tears were in my eyes. I checked the cards I had collected to see which heart I should play next. This caused a controversy as to whether I could check them or not, and the majority decided that I could. This is key.

My checking my cards caused people to have loose stools. They frantically starting checking their cards...turns out Ms. Fiancee was mistaken - she had no hearts...and neither of the other gentlemen had any collected cards, which left me with an Unlucky Lady with 11 Hearts.

And 2 more in my hand.

Softly the words from the stereo washed over the table, "and somewhere in the darkness, the gambler he broke even..."

Needless to say, I shot the frickin' moon, which landed me at 62 and added 26 to everyone, sending Ms. Fiancee over the 100 mark, ending the game.

And THAT'S how you play Hearts!